Your blog is so timely. This morning ing I woke up and though oh I am finally retired. I took care of 3 family members for the last 8 years 2 of which passed recently. Now I am no longer rushing from one event to the next. I can just be. I wonder is this what not rushing feels like? Can I just sit and ponder endless or at least until yard work calls or inspiration blossoms. Rushing yes, that will be a great thing to let go of. 😊
I'm so glad. And such a giant transition from all that caring for others to time for yourself! I remember how strange I felt after both my parents passed away and I didn't have to bring my cell phone next to me in bed in case I got an emergency phone call. I hope you give yourself a big cushion of time to adjust and allow. <3
Joni Mitchell talks about the pressure to be good in For the Roses: “They toss around your latest golden egg
Speculation, who’s to know
If the next one in the nest
Will glitter for them so..”
I appreciate your description of enjoying the process. The best healing and therapy happens when you’re lost (get yourself out of the way), and just loving the process. But thinking about it- takes you right out of the magic ! Important thoughts for all of us. Thanks.
Thanks Lee Ann--and I didn't know that Joni Mitchell lyric, so thanks for that too. Loving the process is really feeling the main thing for me these days--and also process is available to everyone, regardless of "talent" or education or art world acknowledgment or whatever it might be!
Sarah, I'm just loving this! You are such a truth teller. Are/were you a Navy Seal? I won't be surprised if you say yes. Just like everyone responding above, you are bringing it home. And I am looking forward to hearing more about deadlines. They played a large part in my workaholic tendencies (project manager in I.T.).
I love that you are loving this! And LOL, no I was not a Navy SEAL. I just learned that slogan and loved it. :D And I found it fascinating that it IS one of their slogans. It shows how rushing under stress is pervasive. But boy those people learn to handle pressure--it's impressive.
Absolutely spot on, Sarah. It seems as if the month of June has teamed up with you to teach me this very lesson.
I actually hate hurrying and always try to plan ahead to give myself plenty of time, so I had allowed a full year to prepare to self-publish my novel about the women surrealists. But I'm finding that the whole process is like the turning of the seasons: you can't have things out of sequence. Amazon won't let me upload until 90 days before, for instance, and my husband tactfully and helpfully suggested that a cover reveal before anyone could actually (pre) order the book was rather a waste.
Trouble is, I think it's all going to happen at once and I'll be forced to hurry and make mistakes. But the moral is to sometimes let things happen in their own time.
It reminds me of a story I read as a child about an impatient girl who tried to open a flower bud because she couldn't wait to see the flower and of course she destroyed it instead.
I'd love to hear your thoughts on deadlines, too. I had a colleague once who would repeatedly say to students: "deadlines are your friends"!
Yes, it can be tricky. I will try to write about deadlines this week. In the meantime, I'll say this: I try to remember that my self-imposed deadlines are handy and I need to take them seriously, but I can also create my own unneeded stress with them. For instance, I publish this newsletter every Tuesday now, and sometimes it's really hard to spit out what I'm trying to say in the timeframe I've allotted. If I published it on Wednesday one week, would anyone get upset? Hard to imagine really. But I can get myself into a lather about trying to meet that Tuesday deadline. Perhaps, if you are self-publishing your novel as you say, could you possibly amend your deadline to adapt to the unexpected obstacles that have popped up?
Thanks, Sarah, it's good to have that option, and we Substackers are lucky to have such a lot of flexibility. I don't notice what day you post, I just know it will be interesting!
Another wonderful and thought provoking article. Venturing into new territory IS scary. I wish the economics were not even a blip on the radar, for that surely is a large part of the rush to produce.Drat!!
Yes, that's a real thing. And when you're making a living off your art, it can be hard for risks and explorations to not feel like a dangerous detour. Of course, you manage to do both!
I've also been thinking about the difference between deadlines and rushing and thought I might write about that sometime soon.
Thank you for this beautiful and kind reminder. I once had a therapist whose email was “go slow to go fast” and I really resonated with that. It’s still a practice! 💗
So happy it resonated Mariah! And maybe your therapist was a fan of that Navy Seal maxim as well. :D I'm thinking I need to embroider it on something--which will be a good reminder as embroidery itself is a slow process. <3
Thank you Teyani. Yes about the hurrying people--I thought the Navy Seal maxim kind of indicated that--it's such a common response to stress that they had to come up with a saying for their recruits to internalize. Of course, their stress was/is more life and death than making art! ;D
I needed to hear this today. Sometimes when I'm working I find myself in a frenzy trying to get something done. My output is usually very slow while I work on several different projects at a time. I get impatient with myself and forget that art is something I enjoy.
Yay! I, too, work on a bunch of stuff at once--which helps me not overly focus on one thing and ruin it with my poking and fixing, but sometimes it can also feel like nothing is getting finished. It's good to have faith in our own pace, but hard in a culture that always acts like more is better.
I also really love your comments about the fear that we might find out that we are just so-so at something, and that we might remain just so-so even if we do put in a lot of effort. That is indeed scary. And that that is another reason why we need to focus on the process of doing whatever it is we care about, whether that be making art or doing yoga. Such a good message.
As someone who likes sports, I see nice examples of this in adults who compete in athletic competitions, like running races. Most are not knocking anybody's socks off. A few win the events, but winning them isn't going to bring them fame or fortune. And most are just in the pack, doing it for themselves. You could argue that the competitive nature of this goes against the message that we should focus on process, but I think it points to "it's good to do it because you enjoy doing it, and for no other reason."
YES--excellent example. And people can be really great athletes, but not so great they 'went pro' or whatever. So they have the joy of their process and their commitment to what they care about doing!
So insightful. And it resonates. My favorite lines: But we can’t hurry ourselves out of our unknowing. Rushing gives nothing and takes everything. Honor your pace. It has to be right because it’s yours.
Your blog is so timely. This morning ing I woke up and though oh I am finally retired. I took care of 3 family members for the last 8 years 2 of which passed recently. Now I am no longer rushing from one event to the next. I can just be. I wonder is this what not rushing feels like? Can I just sit and ponder endless or at least until yard work calls or inspiration blossoms. Rushing yes, that will be a great thing to let go of. 😊
I'm so glad. And such a giant transition from all that caring for others to time for yourself! I remember how strange I felt after both my parents passed away and I didn't have to bring my cell phone next to me in bed in case I got an emergency phone call. I hope you give yourself a big cushion of time to adjust and allow. <3
Oh, just go ahead and read my damn mind, why don't you?! So good. Soooo good.
:D Thank you Paula--I love when it resonates!
Joni Mitchell talks about the pressure to be good in For the Roses: “They toss around your latest golden egg
Speculation, who’s to know
If the next one in the nest
Will glitter for them so..”
I appreciate your description of enjoying the process. The best healing and therapy happens when you’re lost (get yourself out of the way), and just loving the process. But thinking about it- takes you right out of the magic ! Important thoughts for all of us. Thanks.
Thanks Lee Ann--and I didn't know that Joni Mitchell lyric, so thanks for that too. Loving the process is really feeling the main thing for me these days--and also process is available to everyone, regardless of "talent" or education or art world acknowledgment or whatever it might be!
Sarah, I'm just loving this! You are such a truth teller. Are/were you a Navy Seal? I won't be surprised if you say yes. Just like everyone responding above, you are bringing it home. And I am looking forward to hearing more about deadlines. They played a large part in my workaholic tendencies (project manager in I.T.).
I love that you are loving this! And LOL, no I was not a Navy SEAL. I just learned that slogan and loved it. :D And I found it fascinating that it IS one of their slogans. It shows how rushing under stress is pervasive. But boy those people learn to handle pressure--it's impressive.
Absolutely spot on, Sarah. It seems as if the month of June has teamed up with you to teach me this very lesson.
I actually hate hurrying and always try to plan ahead to give myself plenty of time, so I had allowed a full year to prepare to self-publish my novel about the women surrealists. But I'm finding that the whole process is like the turning of the seasons: you can't have things out of sequence. Amazon won't let me upload until 90 days before, for instance, and my husband tactfully and helpfully suggested that a cover reveal before anyone could actually (pre) order the book was rather a waste.
Trouble is, I think it's all going to happen at once and I'll be forced to hurry and make mistakes. But the moral is to sometimes let things happen in their own time.
It reminds me of a story I read as a child about an impatient girl who tried to open a flower bud because she couldn't wait to see the flower and of course she destroyed it instead.
I'd love to hear your thoughts on deadlines, too. I had a colleague once who would repeatedly say to students: "deadlines are your friends"!
Yes, it can be tricky. I will try to write about deadlines this week. In the meantime, I'll say this: I try to remember that my self-imposed deadlines are handy and I need to take them seriously, but I can also create my own unneeded stress with them. For instance, I publish this newsletter every Tuesday now, and sometimes it's really hard to spit out what I'm trying to say in the timeframe I've allotted. If I published it on Wednesday one week, would anyone get upset? Hard to imagine really. But I can get myself into a lather about trying to meet that Tuesday deadline. Perhaps, if you are self-publishing your novel as you say, could you possibly amend your deadline to adapt to the unexpected obstacles that have popped up?
Thanks, Sarah, it's good to have that option, and we Substackers are lucky to have such a lot of flexibility. I don't notice what day you post, I just know it will be interesting!
Another wonderful and thought provoking article. Venturing into new territory IS scary. I wish the economics were not even a blip on the radar, for that surely is a large part of the rush to produce.Drat!!
Yes, that's a real thing. And when you're making a living off your art, it can be hard for risks and explorations to not feel like a dangerous detour. Of course, you manage to do both!
I've also been thinking about the difference between deadlines and rushing and thought I might write about that sometime soon.
Thank you for this beautiful and kind reminder. I once had a therapist whose email was “go slow to go fast” and I really resonated with that. It’s still a practice! 💗
So happy it resonated Mariah! And maybe your therapist was a fan of that Navy Seal maxim as well. :D I'm thinking I need to embroider it on something--which will be a good reminder as embroidery itself is a slow process. <3
Haha, yes! So many layers to integration. :)
This is so true!
I love that line “I come from hurrying people”. I suspect that most of us could say that.
Thank you Teyani. Yes about the hurrying people--I thought the Navy Seal maxim kind of indicated that--it's such a common response to stress that they had to come up with a saying for their recruits to internalize. Of course, their stress was/is more life and death than making art! ;D
It creates the perfect link in my brain.
😍
I needed to hear this today. Sometimes when I'm working I find myself in a frenzy trying to get something done. My output is usually very slow while I work on several different projects at a time. I get impatient with myself and forget that art is something I enjoy.
Yay! I, too, work on a bunch of stuff at once--which helps me not overly focus on one thing and ruin it with my poking and fixing, but sometimes it can also feel like nothing is getting finished. It's good to have faith in our own pace, but hard in a culture that always acts like more is better.
I also really love your comments about the fear that we might find out that we are just so-so at something, and that we might remain just so-so even if we do put in a lot of effort. That is indeed scary. And that that is another reason why we need to focus on the process of doing whatever it is we care about, whether that be making art or doing yoga. Such a good message.
As someone who likes sports, I see nice examples of this in adults who compete in athletic competitions, like running races. Most are not knocking anybody's socks off. A few win the events, but winning them isn't going to bring them fame or fortune. And most are just in the pack, doing it for themselves. You could argue that the competitive nature of this goes against the message that we should focus on process, but I think it points to "it's good to do it because you enjoy doing it, and for no other reason."
YES--excellent example. And people can be really great athletes, but not so great they 'went pro' or whatever. So they have the joy of their process and their commitment to what they care about doing!
So insightful. And it resonates. My favorite lines: But we can’t hurry ourselves out of our unknowing. Rushing gives nothing and takes everything. Honor your pace. It has to be right because it’s yours.
Thank you--and thank you for sharing your favorite lines--that made me so happy!